I never thought

I never thought I would WANT to forgive him. But today when I woke up, I felt so burdened and his name was on my heart.
My father taught me something all of my life, it got annoying when I was a kid, but now... it's something that helps day in and day out... "Kill them with kindness" .... So given the circumstance, I can't just be nice, but I can stop being mean about him. I can kill the mean/evil thoughts in my mind towards him with kindness.... I can start thinking of him as a brother in Christ instead of the person who broke my heart and then some.
He doesn't deserve for me to forgive him...but nor do I deserve for christ to forgive me the way he does. It is no different, and as a child of the King, so should my actions.

pray for me, for this is in NO way easy, it is completely against what my flesh wants to do.... ugh