this mystery we call life

Wow, so this life.... the journey... the adventure... the craziness of it all is something of true mysterious beauty.
This weekend I was hit by the excitement of my future. There is absolutely nothing out of my range of possibilities! WOW! That is exciting. Who knows where He is going to take me in my life! I know that it is going to be great, that it is going to stretch me, and that it is going to grow me... all while giving me the most amazing gift of just life. Life is something that I have taken for granted in the past, something that I did not understand the greatness of it. We only have one opportunity to be all that we are made to be, to leave a legacy for Christ, to give it all to gain eternity.... One chance to say "alright God, make this good. I trust you. You do this. I want it to be beautiful, like the beauty you and only you can create. I can't see the future, I don't know myself like you do, I don't know what I want... so You just TAKE ME!"
So in the midst of the craziness of this thing called my life, I find peace and an uncontrollable joy that I have NO CLUE where my life is going other than in the way He intends! :) I know right now it is easy to say and one day it will be tougher than today... but for now I will find my joy in knowing He is now in control completely. Hopefully that joy will push me through those tough days.






And on another subject....
My anger towards Daniel is subsiding and this funny feeling of "haha" is coming over me. I am blessed that he showed me who he really was, I am fortunate that he broke my heart like he did because now... I want no part of that in my life, and I really could care less about all the dreams "we" had. He missed out on me... too bad for him. He made this girl tougher, stronger, and less likely to EVER want someone like him in my life. :) It's awesome. And now that I am moving on, getting over him... I am happier than ever.
I would love to get the opportunity to speak to him one last time. Or wait, I would love to just live the most awesome life ever and go back to him and say "thanks butt"! :)






I am proud of the way I have dealt the cards I have been handed the last 4 months. It has made me so much stronger. I found out the people who really mattered in life were those that really won't ever leave you. I have found out that friends are important, they are the things that give you that extra "umph" when you need it, but Christ is the ONLY one who can satisify. He is all I need. I have discovered that opportunities come and go, its just up to you to jump on it and ride because if you don't, they arent' gonna stop for you. I have learned that I am strong, I am beautiful, I am unique and the only one that can do what He made ME for. I found out that you can cry about something someone did but not be crying for them, and that tears are not admitting defeat, but watering the seed that will grow into the new you. I figured out that laughter is truely a medicine for the soul and that girl nights are a NECESSITY TO LIFE! I have discovered that pictures aren't always permanent and memories last longer, even when you don't want to remember them anymore.
But above all, I have realized how lucky I am to be me. How blessed I am, even when all has fallen apart. And that God is good to His children.
Amen