Trust

So lately the word trust is a floating cloud above me.

I have been in situations where my trust has been broken, situations that I have questioned the very definition of trust and the appropriate usage of it....
See, when you have had your trust broken by people (( this is mostly about the male gender by the way )) most people would be very guarded in a natural way in order to protect themselves... well you see... I'm not most people. Every fiber in me wants to trust ever person I come into contact... but the reality of that is that the moment I do that is the moment I put myself out there to get hurt. So the remedy? Well. Be guarded, teach myself to trust but in a way that keeps my heart hidden and mysterious. Yet, this is something that is rare to me, that takes effort... the kind of effort that is frustrating, but that will pay off in the end I do believe...

I am enjoying the challenges my "love" life is bringing me. The last few months has taught me quite a bit about myself and my goals. I have been so incredibly blessed by a circle of friends that have helped me uncover the hard questions and face them with me. God knew what he was doing when He told me no when I was begging him to bring me someone that I could share me with.... and He brought me five of them... I call them my best friends... they know me. I trust them with all of me, I am at home with them... They are my angels.

So for now, trust and guys... well I'm working on it. I don't want it to be a cloud over me anymore... I want to just go with it... to be a mystery, be sought after, and for someone to let me trust them in time...

:)